Sunday, June 13, 2010

Self Esteem Boost.

Be warned, this post will have some cursing. I was running errands yesterday and I had to get to the bank before it closed so I took a taxi. I get in the car, and the driver says Ay que rico hueles, cualquiera se enamora con una mujer como tú/Oh you smell good, anyone would fall in love with a woman like you. This was totally unexpected, I laughed. I thought ok, what did I do today that I haven't been doing everyday? 

Yes, I haven't been complimented by a man in a long time. The driver then asked me the question that somehow I knew was coming, tú eres Puertorriqueña/are you Puerto Rican, I said yes. He then says, tú pareces española tienes un físico bello/you look Spaniard you have a beautiful physique. With a big question mark over my head, I just said gracias/thanks and smiled. We get to the bank and he says cuídate preciosa/take care beautiful. I of course thanked him, he made my day. Now, I was very flattered and at the same time I felt awkward. Like I didn't deserved it, I know I am that fucked up. My self esteem is almost non existent at this time. Haters, fucked up people can do that to you, even your own family. 

I am over 40 years old, I struggle with my self esteem issues. However at this point I'm starting not to give a shit what people think about me 'some days' when I'm in a fuck it mood. Most days it does gets to me and those days I want to crawl in a hole and not come out. Hence the name of my blog in case anyone was curious. 

So, to the stranger driving the taxi, gracias for giving me a much needed self esteem boost! Good to know that even if not everyone sees it, I still got it! Although I have sworn off dating, sex, relationships and men for now or maybe forever. Really, who the fuck needs the headache!
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